There once was a time I clawed my way out of a very dark place. I had helping hands. They grounded me. Gave me purpose. It was all I had. If a few of those hands let go…quite simply it can crush your soul. It’s a slippery slope back down. The continuous playback in your head of what exactly went wrong can consume you.

I can’t let it any longer.  I’ve let this affect good things in my life. These are things I want, need, and deserve. They are a part of me. If you hurt them, you hurt me. If you disrespect them, you disrespect me. I am a good person, albeit a sarcastic dick at times, but I have owned my past transgressions. I didn’t deserve this. I don’t deserve to be lied to. I don’t deserve to be dismissed. I don’t deserve to be played. I don’t deserve disrespect…and for the record I am not required to be the only party held accountable that’s not how it works.  

Self preservation mode has been booting up for awhile now. It’s now been activated.

Thanks I needed that. Back to the program,  Styk

 

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